Monday, 29 March 2010

Not norovirus, but labyrinthitis

Labyrinthitis in my case takes the form of a viral infection of the inner ear, which - like most viral infections - has no cure.

It lasts around two weeks ... or maybe much longer.

And means that any movement of the head causes acute world-spin, nausea, vomiting ... and for me, at one point a black out - - When you wake up on your back dry-heaving, you realize that two near death experiences in the last 12 months is a little bit more interesting than is comfortable.

Luckily they do these nifty little pills that taste vile, which you stick under your upper lip, and they stop the vommiting. They do not however stop the nausea and dizziness.

Norovirus would seem to be, by comparison, a walk in the park.

Thanks Fairy God-Cat. ... Laugh it up you b*stard furball!

Thursday, 25 March 2010

Possibly norovirus ...

I kid you not.


The Fairy God-Cat is taking the piss with this one. Grrr....

Tuesday, 16 March 2010

What is this, the year of Lurgy?


I don't effing believe it. *gnashing of teeth*

I'm recovering nicely from losing 5 weeks, and decide to accept my friend's invitation to visit beautiful South Devon to get fully pampered and catered too like the proverbial cat who got the cream, and recuperate fully in luxury.


- Take great care not to pass the final remnants of my lurgy to my friend and her family? Tick.
- Waited on hand and foot? Tick.
- Lie on the sofa watching the rugby? Tick.
- Do next to nothing at all? Tick.
- Enjoy gentle walks through amazing countryside? Tick.
- Eat myself in to a stupor? Tick.
- Get better and start to feel truly alive again (aside from the ongoing fatigue)? Tick.
- Take great care not to pass the final remnants of my lurgy to my friend and her family? Tick. Tick.

So far, everything is going according to plan.

Then on the last day my friend starts feeling unwell ... Headache and temperature.
And I feel GUILTY AS ALL HELL for giving her plague! - - Except, I didn't.

Got home - everything fine, do the chores, get a bit of writing done, catch up on TV procrastination. Wake up today, still alive, firing on all cylinders, HOORAY! Except, just after 12 noon I start feeling a bit odd.

I now have a headache and a temperature ... the exact same symptoms my friend has. I stop feeling guilty as all hell and reach for the paracetamol.



More importantly, stop giving your vile lurgies to me. I have been more than ill enough in the last 6 months to last me at least 10 years. In fact probably 20.


The next person who sneezes or coughs near me is gonna get... - Well I'll think of something deeply unpleasant to do to you.
I won't actually do it, I'll just think about doing it. And I'll smile at you while I'm thinking about it.
I may even make notes, and have your imagined fate played out in the next horror nasty I write. Then I'll smile again, because I'm not a very nice person deep down when you get past the layers of socialization and not wanting to go to gaol for mass murder.

So if you are in East Devon, and you sneeze, or cough, and some psycho woman starts smiling at you, and possibly grinding her teeth. It's me, alright? You've been warned.



[*I am alluding to Typhoid Mary here, obviously.]

[UPDATE: 17 March 2010 - Bliss! This is one of the old school lurgies I remember from the 90's and before, where you have half a day of feeling really crap, followed by just feeling a bit grotty for several days afterwards. Thank f*ck!]

Tuesday, 2 March 2010

5 Weeks Lost - A.K.A. PLAGUE

Blech is all I can say... just about... I'm still ill - with plague on top of the ongoing exhaustion and fatigue. (Probably because of them)

End of January I came down with a nasty lurgy, which then morphed into a throat infection, ulcers, the lot. It is quite disgusting, and seems to be affecting my ability to think creatively - or at all. Grump.

This is the 3rd set of different antibiotics that I'm on (don't even ask - all I can say is "Doctors, grrr.").

So that's 5 weeks lost to plague. I'm not happy about it.

This morning I'm functioning well enough brain-wise, but if other good days are anything to go by I'll be lucky if I still feel this way in 3 hours time.

Well, I'd better go put pen to paper while I'm feeling halfway alive.
February. (derisive) Hah!
Fricking bl**dy March already.

Anyone know a good snake-oil curative? I'm willing to try anything* at this stage.

[*well, okay, not anything, but most things - if it has a chance in Hades of clearing this vile pestilence.]