Sunday 14 June 2009

Want a good scare?

Go see Drag Me To Hell.

...N'ah it's by that Spider-Man bloke... ...and it's PG-13**...

You are a died in the wool horror fan? Yes?
You loved Saw.
The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (the original) made you shudder delightfully.
In short you like a bit of sickness with your horror-high.

If you don't already know about Sam Raimi's horror chops, I guess you've never seen the Evil Dead films. Shame on you!
(If Evil Dead II changed your life, this is better!)

Next thing you'll be telling me you haven't seen Peter Jackson's early work. *rolls eyes*

Go educate yourself. How can you call yourself a horror fan if you don't know about Sam Raimi?

Drag Me To Hell is one of those films that is packed with scare. Ignore the teen friendly rating, it means nothing. This film made me terrified of a handkerchief for Dog's sake!

It will make you jump - a lot. It will gross you out - yes, even you! You too will be scared of a humble piece of cloth with some nice embroidery on it. It will make you laugh in that sort of "Oh my god that's sick!" kind of way. There are some satisfying visual references to other horror films - - who can forget that house? And generally you'll spend most of the film about a foot above the seat of your chair* - which lets face it, you don't really want to be sitting on anyway because you spilled your coke all over it in the first few minutes, and then accidentally dumped the popcorn on it a few seconds after that.

Okay, so you take my advice, you go to the cinema, get comfy, the film starts, introductory scene shows promise of what's to come, and then it goes to the meet the characters section and for about 5 minutes you are wondering why you came to watch this boring ass film ... that Eleanor doesn't know what the f**k she's talking about.

But don't leave.

Trust me on this.

As soon as the gypsy turns up - and then the action kicks in in the car park, you (like me and my friend) will not be able to take a toilet break (despite a serious need to relieve yourself from drinking too much coke before the film started) for fear of missing something.

I haven't nearly wet myself in the cinema for so many years! Sam Raimi really is the master.

Go see it.

The cinema was half empty when I went on Saturday night to the 7pm showing. I couldn't believe it. Get the word out. This is a film all horror fans need to see!
It uses old school horror methods to grab you by the throat and give you heart-attack after heart-attack, and as a result it gets the teen rating - despite being a film I wouldn't let any teen** in my care go and see. :) Nice one Sam.

*jumping in shock and terror!
**PG-13? They're nuts!!!

TERROR RATING: 9.8
(Most films are lucky to get 7.# from me. I almost never give out scores like this. Films that have rated 8.0+? I can count them on 1 hand.)

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